Gratitude has a positive impact on our behavior – let us be more honest, increase our self-control, and improve our work efficiency and family relations.

Therefore, you may think that I think Thanksgiving is one of the most important days of the year. After all, if the benefits of thanksgiving are maximized

on a certain day, it must be a national holiday specially set up to express such feelings.

But to be honest, thanksgiving is a waste on Thanksgiving. Don’t get me wrong: I like the rhythm and ritual tradition of the day as much as everyone else.

It is just these things that make Thanksgiving so wonderful – the company of relatives and friends, the time without work, and enjoying a special turkey

dinner – that make Thanksgiving unnecessary.

One of the core purposes of gratitude is to help us establish strong ties with others. Psychologist Sara Algoe’s research shows that when we are grateful

for others’ thoughtfulness, we think they may be worth further understanding. Gratitude motivates us to take the first step in building a relationship

with strangers. Once we get to know others better, continuous gratitude will strengthen our connection with them. Being grateful for others’ help also

makes us more willing to offer help to people we don’t know – psychologist Monica Bartlett discovered this phenomenon – which makes others want

to know us.

But when we sit around the Thanksgiving table with relatives and friends, we usually don’t deliberately seek out others and establish new relationships.

On this day, we have been with the people we cherish.

To be clear, I am not saying that it is not worth taking time to reflect and express appreciation for the beautiful things in life. This is certainly a noble act.

But from the scientific point of view – the existence of emotions will promote our decisions and behaviors to develop in a specific direction – the benefits

of gratitude often become irrelevant on the day when they are most expressed.

Here is another example. My laboratory research shows that gratitude helps to be honest. When my colleagues and I asked people to report whether the

coin they threw in private was positive or negative (positive means they will get more money), those who became grateful (by counting their own happiness)

were only half as likely to cheat as others. We know who cheated because the coin is designed to face up

Gratitude also makes us more generous: in our experiment, when people have the opportunity to share money with strangers, we found that those who

are grateful will share 12% more on average.

On Thanksgiving Day, however, cheating and stinginess are not usually our sins. (Unless you count that I ate too much of Aunt Donna’s famous fillings.)

Self control can also be improved through gratitude. My colleagues and I have found that grateful people are less likely to make impulsive financial

choices – they are more willing to be patient with future investment returns, rather than greedy for small profits. This self-control also applies to diet:

as the findings of psychologist Sonja Lyubomirsky and her colleagues show, grateful people are more likely to resist unhealthy food.

But at Thanksgiving, self-control is certainly not the point. No one needs to remind himself to save more money in his retirement account; The banks

are closed. Besides, if I can’t eat more Amy’s pumpkin pie on Thanksgiving Day, when will I wait?

Gratitude also makes us more efficient. Psychologists Adam Grant and Francesca Gino found that when bosses expressed gratitude for the hard work

of employees in the financing department, their active efforts would suddenly increase by 33%. Expressing more gratitude in the office is also closely

related to higher job satisfaction and happiness.

Again, all gratitude is great. But unless it is a service industry, you may not work on Thanksgiving.

I want to point out another advantage of gratitude: it can reduce materialism. Research by psychologist Nathaniel Lambert shows that being more

grateful will not only improve people’s satisfaction with life, but also reduce their desire to buy things. This finding is consistent with the research

of psychologist Thomas Gilovich, which shows that people tend to be more grateful for the time spent with others than for expensive gifts.

But on Thanksgiving, avoiding impulse shopping is usually not a big problem. (But Black Friday the next day is another matter.)

Therefore, when you and your loved ones get together on Thanksgiving Day this year, you will find that the joy of this day – delicious food, family

and friends, peace of mind – is relatively easy to come by. We should get together on the fourth Thursday in November to console each other and relax.

But on the other 364 days of the year – days when you may feel lonely, stressed at work, confused to cheat or petty, stopping to cultivate gratitude

will make a big difference. Thanksgiving may not be a time for thanksgiving, but thanksgiving on other days can help you ensure that you can get

a lot of things to be grateful for in the future.